Jealousy is a Waste of Good Energy

I was approached by one of my close friends and asked if I ever suffer or feel a sense of jealously of my fiancés past. I have to say “not really”. I do have to express I’m not fond of the fact that he had a relationship with someone while we were apart; not the sexual aspect of it; more of the emotional inner part of it, you know getting to know that person; sharing, understanding the interest of something new. Well I guess that’s the most imperative part of a new relationship…sink or swim….right?
I do feel that jealously is a lack of security and I don’t like to even slightly feel that emotion. We normally do not talk about our break up; better to move forward in life, than think about the mistakes made. I do believe mistakes are lessons learned and often times STUPIDITY…as he stated “the grass isn’t always greener on the other side”, I could have told him that. Sometimes in certain lives we do need to take that turn that one that puts you, me, we on different paths to appreciate those things you once had and hopefully if desired get that second chance. He was at least able to recognize with this other person just how much we treasured one another. Jealousy can be a daunting undertaking, especially when all things considered, the only person that can truly overcome or realize jealousy is truly a waste of good energy. Handling it like a mature, rational person is what we all have to do to overcome it and realize it is truly an unhealthy way to live. If you think about it and rationalize that there is no reason to really be jealous, then the feelings of jealousy comes less often, or less severely until it gets to the point where jealousy is nothing more than a chance for you and your partner to bond with a flirtatious look rather than a jealous emotion. Lastly, remember that jealousy is never "just a phase" of a relationship. It can be a serious issue that you can make or break an otherwise a healthy relationship. So, I choose to be happy and know that I have nothing but the upmost respect for him and our paths we chose to take to get us here. It's not always easy, but in the end it is worth it. Thanks for all the wonderful comments. love always, Carla